just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize
