shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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