This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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