I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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