so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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