"it" just moved
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
