She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
