I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
