Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Randomize
