i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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