If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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