You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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