Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Randomize
