I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I want her autograph on my taint
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
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