you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
