I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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