maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize