Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
