just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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