ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
