i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
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