Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
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