Soap is not a condiment
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Randomize
