Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
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