Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
