What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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