It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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