im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
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