is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
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