Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
he was CRYING into my vagina
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I'm too high and old for this...
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