I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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