you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
It's rum buckets o'clock
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
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