She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
