How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
