I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
i out mim tonsoeep
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