I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
she looked like the before picture.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Randomize
