I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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