windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Randomize
