It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
