You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
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