I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
