I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
