porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
