I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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