We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Randomize
