is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Randomize
