Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize
