it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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