Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
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