i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
