Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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