hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
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